@drkathynickerson: After an affair, betrayed partners need radical honesty from the cheating partner. This is because it's impossible to feel safe when you don't know what is true and what's not true. We need to have painful conversations in order to get to "Ground Zero" and then we can start rebuilding. It's very scary for the straying partner to do this, which is why we need to flip the script. You will not lose your partner by telling the truth, you will lose your partner by keeping secrets. What are your thoughts about this? #infidelityinamarriage #infidelityrecovery #affairrecovery #affairrecoverycoach #betrayaltraumarecovery
I think knowing less is better for you and for your mental health. The more details you know you will dwell on it more and that will not let you move on the painful phase you are in.
2025-09-09 18:26:50
44
ShakemanCamaro :
cheated on? If you want to forgive them, they have to get hooked up to a lie detector and you can ask as many questions as you want. If not, RUN!
2025-09-10 01:01:35
22
Chuckles :
They cheated for attention and validation don’t give them more dump them and move on simple
2025-09-10 11:53:30
14
chick :
Welcome to my life
2025-11-04 05:13:52
0
user7454582120763 :
But most of the time the denial is the first course of action
2025-10-12 17:09:23
4
Benedikt :
Okay but what if I genuinely don’t remember everything anymore??? I feel like it’s all blacked out because I cannot even imagine I’m the same person that did all that
2025-09-10 09:00:23
3
SassyPants :
No matter how much evidence I have, he won't budget.
2025-09-10 21:06:32
1
Chris :
The answer is: you’ll never know all of it. A cheating partner won’t ever own up to everything. Even/especially the most narcissistic ones won’t have the courage to admit their reasons. Most people can’t be honest with themselves as to the worst part of their personalities and their behavior - their failures. So, figuring out a way to stop your need to find THE answer is the only way you’ll ever recover.
2025-09-11 01:30:43
14
Snow White :
I like this be brave
2025-09-11 19:47:53
2
DirtyDaddy :
Bottom line if they have cheated or had an affair. It’s over leave Luan. You’ll never forget it even if he did forgive it. As a man, it will always be on your mind. Don’t try to fix nothing. That is so broken. Just get a new one.
2025-09-10 10:19:27
3
Megan Rice :
This is exactly what I needed to hear I actually feel validated now for my feelings thank you x
2025-09-09 17:54:11
4
Princess Peaches 👑🍑 :
What about when they try to say they don’t “remember” until you find facts and then all of a sudden they do remember.
2025-09-14 14:21:47
7
annieg :
My ex lied even when I had evidence like receipts from hotels when I was out of town. He lied and lied and lied. This is why I got divorced.
2025-09-12 10:55:21
2
txclesca :
I found something today after I thought everything was great after almost 2 years. I loggged into his Spotify account which he knows I have his password to use. She I guess created a fake account and sent him sounds. But it’s random dates. One was this last weekend the day before our wedding anniversary. I’m livid. Do I tell him? There’s no messages. Do I just watch the account?
2025-09-09 21:54:59
4
💫💓Sassy🩷💫 :
Sorry, but once they've crossed that adultry line, I could care less about the who, what, where, why, and how come. That's their problem. I don't want to be a therapist, I want to be a wife.
2025-09-10 11:53:45
9
Eric Coleman901 :
So Dr. K good afternoon I have a question how is it that they are afraid of losing you if they come clean where as them cheating on you will cause them to lose you?
2025-09-11 20:26:59
0
happierblazecandlecollc :
Per my therapist , I’m not allowed to to bring up the affair..:she says it just reminds him of her
2025-09-15 12:04:57
0
Liz :
All I need to know is the word “affair”. No more details thank you. See you in court for our divorce hearing. It’s really not for my safety but for theirs. If the partner knew about me.
2025-09-10 15:48:34
0
Elpida :
They have believed the story themselves. I’ve stopped asking for the truth, I have finally accepted that I married a deceiver whose dishonesty runs in his veins. They can do them while I do me as long as it doesn’t affect me and my kids.
2025-09-16 10:55:52
1
Lisaaaaaaaaaa :
How do you really know??? Because I am definitely one to let my imagination run to the worst and crazy places.
2025-09-09 19:04:24
8
Kate Miller :
I've tried that but he struggles, what do I say? I'm awake at 00:30 and he's asleep. we had a whole conversation today but I've found more evidence
2025-09-09 23:29:34
2
Cathie Zimmerman :
Now she says “I don’t remember” or “I don’t want to do all that” “I know what I have to do but I don’t want to” or tries to use it as an excuse to contact him to “get me answers.”
2025-09-15 13:25:26
0
nate :
but what if they actually don't know anything? what if there actually isn't more to it then what you're saying is the truth?
2025-09-10 01:47:50
1
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