natalie louise
Region: US
Saturday 14 June 2025 18:40:22 GMT
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lovelaceandrage :
Avoidants don’t actually notice us—they notice the impact of their own avoidance. They condition us to prioritize them, to regulate their emotional world, and when we do, they pull away—claiming we’re too dependent or too much. But the truth is, they create the very co-dependency they fear. They birth the anxiety they later reject. We’re not boring or lack personality. We lose ourselves in the avoidants world and then get punished for it with a discard.
2025-06-14 20:21:43
768
TJinTexas :
Avoidants aren’t the devil but never date them.
2025-06-14 21:27:19
975
zek :
ehhh but its the opposite im giving her space, yes i do be obsessed with her sometimes but not all the time like, dang are we gonna work or something?
2025-09-05 01:06:13
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ciara.phelan_ :
Anxious attachments in the comments have a superiority complex and love being victims like y’all’s attachment style is unhealthy too
2025-06-15 20:14:52
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mambozako :
Treat them like narcissists, cut them off permanently and go no contact forever.
2025-06-15 02:19:33
277
daisy🌸 :
Let’s be real, you can give all the space and time to an avoidant and it will still not help, they will just continue avoiding. That’s why they are avoidant and not securely attached. It’s not you being boring or anything.
2025-06-16 05:19:05
125
Fred :
This is so confusing…🙏🏻But great video. Think I somehow got the hang of it now
2025-09-07 21:16:15
0
Shaeleyyyaldridge :
I want to be loved so badly but I don’t know how, it’s horrible (I’m an avoidant)
2025-06-15 07:03:08
125
Kai :
avoidants be like: "i want someone to love me deeply"
2025-06-15 02:22:17
214
Benoit Levesque :
boring ? its the avoidant that becomes boring
2025-07-14 23:48:41
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Genise ❤️💕 :
Respectfully, as a more securely attached person, this is not a one-size-fits-all situation. At the end of the day, if you can’t deal with conflict resolution then you shouldn’t be dating you should be seeking therapy.
2025-06-15 14:42:25
128
Deltaa :
Pfft avoidents only care about themselves and refuse to heal simple as that. A healthy relationship your partner will want to do with more with you simple as that.
2025-06-15 10:56:44
93
Julius marcroms :
if we don't get obsessed with someone we love. then who do we get obsessed to? do they want us to treat them like all the others?
2025-06-14 23:28:02
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tutucute78787878 :
do avoidant attachment people know their avoidant ?
2025-06-25 16:10:32
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Anette Hagen :
but why do they always come back when you let go and try to move on
2025-07-15 10:53:23
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James :
A secure can be made anxious by an avoidant. When they starve you of intimacy, naturally everyone fears abandonment and so want reassurance. You give yourself up to avoidant because you are starving yourself of mutual affection.
2025-06-15 18:09:36
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=Marvin-Uno= :
In all honesty though. Real love IS BORING. Solid love IS BORING. Steady, reliable love IS BORING. It does not threaten to be unavailable. It does not make you nervous. If you need that to feel alive, you're not ready for true, steady, reliable love
2025-06-25 00:59:56
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Jinxed :
I’m fearful avoidant and the worst thing someone can do is pull away, because that triggers my core wounds and I back off away even further to isolate the pain of that inevitable rejection. Moral of the story for both dismissive and fearfuls, we want the energy to stay the same. We want the energy to match. If you’re undervaluing me it’s a no, if you overvalue me it’s a no. I’m trying to change and be better but it’s hard, and it doesn’t help when the whole world sees your attachment style as the ultimate evil.
2025-07-12 11:45:42
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BadKarma2020 :
Avoidants can do conflict resolution, they do it all the time at work and with other areas in life but when it comes to the partner it’s to much
2025-06-16 01:21:39
23
Melancholy Mania :
Oh no so it’s my fault the avoidant left how do I change thisss
2025-06-14 19:35:46
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Hugh Sosa :
You describe exactly what they think and feel. I know they struggling inside and barely understand why they don’t get atractracted to us because once they got triggered.
2025-07-03 06:20:24
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VindecareaDupaNarcisism :
They are not trying to find peace, they are scared by peace ...they think they lose their freedom trough commitment.
2025-06-15 04:59:10
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JP870 :
It’s all well and good until we get to the “how can we..together..” part. They make it clear that there’s no real desire for “together”. It’s next to impossible to buy into the notion “they crave..they know..they love..they don’t want to hurt you..they love you..” because 100% of everything they do contradicts it. They’re grossed out by love. Period.
2025-06-15 15:34:30
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✤ Tamarra :
As an avoidant , i completely agree !
2025-07-16 11:23:45
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Alison List :
It’s the most confusing thing I’ve ever tried to understand.
2025-07-14 15:47:49
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