CLANKER 💔 :
"Most super heroes have an alter ego so they can have a so-called "normal life". Me? I choose not to. I don't see why I get such flack for not having an alter ego. I mean; it's supposed to be a secret! No one's supposed to know! So what's the point? So if I take a girl on a date and wear the costume, sure, they like to bask in the awe of Universal Man! But when we're alone, you know with the candle light, music and the paracomo, and the fragrant oils and things of this nature, then they come to me and say "Oh Universal Man, maybe you take off the mask, maybe we can see who's underneath–" There's no one underneath! They would be horrified if I asked them to take off their face! This is what Universal Man wears! This is me! Other than being indestructible because of my high density, I am just like YOU! And that's when the breakup starts with the late night recriminations and the slamming of the doors, and the shattering bottles and the things of this nature, and the redistribution of the assets and the "It's not me, it's you" and the "It's not you, it's me", but in Universal Man's experience it's "Always YOU"!" hits hard ngl 🥀
2025-07-27 20:22:52