@melrobbins: Ever feel like you’re the one no one picks? Like you’re always watching other people get chosen, whether it's in love or life, and wondering what’s wrong with you? That story in your head is killing your confidence. @Dr. Meg Jay is a psychologist, professor, and author who has studied this for years. She says the number one thing holding you back in love is not your looks. It’s not your dating history. It’s what you believe about how wanted you are. It’s called "perceived desirability." It shapes every decision you make in dating. And for a lot of people, that belief got shaped by the wrong people, in the wrong rooms, a long time ago. This is the advice I wish I had in my 20s, and what I’m teaching my kids now. This episode of The Mel Robbins Podcast is out now! 🎧 “What I Wish I Knew in My 20s.” #melrobbins #melrobbinspodcast #desirability #relationshipadvice #20sadvice
Mel Robbins
Region: US
Friday 08 August 2025 17:44:50 GMT
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candyyyland555 :
29 and needed to hear this 😭 I’m always rejected by men
2025-08-08 22:55:13
299
Angel 🇨🇦 :
I have a weird thing where I think everyone wants me 💅🏻
2025-08-09 03:17:46
333
MCL :
I found that when a *truly* DGAF about how I’m perceived by men or what they think…is when they came flocking. You have to really believe it though, people can sense it I think
2025-08-09 00:37:57
509
Codependent Dog Mom :
Yeah, I always had low self desirability and never got married sadly so maybe this is true 😢
2025-08-10 01:45:11
0
leighann0571 :
I’m 54 and in this spot
2025-08-09 00:39:42
16
Nessa | the literature spirit :
Yeah it's self concept. This is literally manifestation through belief of oneself
2025-08-09 02:44:52
573
st :
Loving the let them theory💚
2025-08-08 17:51:05
56
Afternoon_eyes :
This is me in my 40’s!
2025-08-10 01:05:25
1
Challanska :
I’m 40 and have an ego the size of Texas. Why WOULDN’T they want me?! I’m great!! Their life will vastly improve with me in it. Women are ALWAYS desired and wanted, regardless of age, weight, looks etc. The question is - What do you want?
2025-08-09 11:59:48
46
Queens1111333 :
I’m actually very delusional because I’m almost 51 and I will always have men wanting me. It’s what I tell myself
2025-08-08 21:42:02
270
Elena 🎀 :
Ladies watch the movie “ I feel pretty” the way you feel about yourself is how others will see you. The right person will see it.
2025-08-09 03:10:43
93
Jenna Neugebauer :
Nailed it! Totally explained me (and my choice for my ex husband). Proud I figured out I’m needed. ❤️
2025-08-09 03:40:49
3
Aminah Louise :
well.....I'm 33 and still no one's first choice so🤷
2025-08-09 03:08:03
11
chata77 :
I’m the opposite, I’m not as HOT as I used to be but I still think I could get just about any man because of my charming personality 😂 and I can feed them, learn to cook ladies and be funny 😆
2025-08-09 07:49:31
15
allisonbekas :
meg jay! read her book, ‘the defining decade,’ strongly recommend!
2025-08-09 04:44:40
2
S :
When you get to mid 30s and this is still happening you realise you’ll never be loved
2025-08-09 07:58:54
45
EK :
They’re always attracted me. But they never seem to approach or follow thru. Very few have
2025-08-09 00:55:21
12
Vickyevo82 :
That is all I want
2025-08-08 20:34:43
5
Mackenzie :
I so needed to hear this!!!
2025-08-08 21:09:17
3
C.B. :
Love you Mel, thank you for changing my life
2025-08-09 00:10:45
26
Mehleena :
That’s crazy because I think everyone lowkey wants me or is attracted to me and no one ever asks me out or says it’s true. 😭😅
2025-08-09 04:47:34
32
Chloé :
Oh no, I’m cooked 😔
2025-08-09 10:57:25
1
Katerina :
This is something I have an extremely hard time with, bc my confidence in my early 20s was sky high, I knew what I was deserving of. Yet constantly feeling let down by “the data”
2025-08-08 20:08:23
82
Sarah :
Dr. Jay is a genius and her work is so important. I hope folks in their 20s who hear this convo also read her book. I’ve used a lot of her concepts coaching younger clients and it has changed their life both in sense of self and trajectory for the future. Wish I had it in my 20s
2025-08-09 16:40:20
2
chloe :
going through this right now 🫠
2025-08-09 08:51:06
6
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