Rachel Doll
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Wednesday 27 August 2025 15:14:50 GMT
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connielou :
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2025-08-27 17:02:00
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![honestly, the only people who hate Mike are the ones who don’t actually understand him. He’s a really complex and layered character. So, let’s break it down. Attachment starts forming in childhood with the people closest to you. That’s when a kid’s brain basically learns what love and closeness look like “safe or unsafe”. Mike grew up in a world where attachment was unpredictable and unsafe. And every single season just keeps reinforcing the same wound: “the people you love can always disappear.” And that’s why Mike developed an anxious avoidant style. Most of the time he can’t actually help his friends, all he can do is watch while their lives are hanging by a thread. And watching is sometimes worse than living through it yourself, because it comes with guilt: “I should’ve helped, but I couldn’t.” For a kid, seeing the people they love suffer is deeply traumatic. That’s where his complicated behavior comes from. Avoidance kicks in when the fear of loss is too overwhelming: it feels safer to push someone away or blame them than to admit you’re vulnerable. But then the anxious side takes over: “Why did I do that? What if they actually leave now?” That’s when guilt sets in. So we constantly see Mike get angry, then apologize. That’s the anxious avoidant cycle. His brain basically wired itself to survive with this strategy: “hold on tight so you don’t lose them, but push them away so they don’t reject you.” He craves reassurance that he matters, but he struggles to give that reassurance back. He’s too scared of being hurt if he shows weakness or his true feelings. And here’s the key: Mike is the one most affected by the trauma of the early seasons. El and Will are the two people closest to him, but the fear shows up in totally different ways. With El, it’s the fear of being unwanted. With Will, it’s the fear of losing him completely. You can see it the most clearly with Max. Max represents Mike’s worst fear: someone new coming in and making him replaceable. When Will shows interest in Max, Mike’s anger isn’t just about her “breaking the rules.” He sees her as a threat to his bond with Will. His fear of being replaced turns into frustration with Max. Season three shows the same pattern with El. Mike panics when he feels like he’s losing her and convinces himself Max is turning her against him. Deep down, he’s terrified El will outgrow him, become independent, and leave him behind. Since he can’t admit that, all his anger spills onto Max instead. So it’s always the same core pattern: fear of being unwanted. Sure, sometimes Mike comes off as a typical self centered teenager (which is totally normal at his age). But underneath, it’s not about wanting control or being the leader, it’s about not being able to handle the thought of losing the emotional importance he has in the lives of the people he loves. That’s why his actions make sense. With Will, he feels real closeness and value, but because it makes him so vulnerable, he protects himself with avoidance. In season four’s finale, he only confesses his feelings to El because of the life or death situation. That’s not free choice that’s panic. This doesn’t make him bad or incapable of love. It just means he learned a defense strategy to survive. And that’s why season five is going to be so important for him. He has to learn how to be honest and vulnerable. That’s the only way he’s ever going to find happiness. So you can't blame him guys his mind is surviving as best it can. 🙊🙊 [ dt @бляблябля #strangerthings #mikewheeler #byler #mileven #mikewheeleredit ]](/video/cover/7555322160038956344.webp)
