@separation.gallery: See over view for this topic in the comments please ➡️ 1. Forgetting the small wins She shares excitement about finishing a project, he shrugs with “That’s what you’re supposed to do.” To him: He grew up where effort was overlooked unless it was extraordinary. To her: It feels like her efforts are invisible. Handle it: Celebrate the small, not just the big. 2. Comparing instead of affirming In conversation he says, “My ex never had issues with this,” or “So-and-so handles it better.” To him: It’s casual reference, not comparison. To her: It makes her feel inadequate. Handle it: Say, “I appreciate how you do things,” without measuring her against someone else. 3. Minimizing her boundaries She says, “I don’t like when you joke about that,” he replies, “You’re too sensitive.” To him: Boundaries were seen as weakness growing up. To her: It teaches her voice doesn’t matter. Handle it: Acknowledge by saying, “I didn’t realize that hurt you, I’ll stop.” 4. Lack of curiosity She opens up about her passions, he changes the subject or doesn’t ask more. To him: He wasn’t taught emotional curiosity, only problem-solving. To her: She feels uninteresting and dismissed. Handle it: Respond with, “Tell me more, I want to understand.” 5. Overpraising others, underpraising her He compliments friends, coworkers, or even strangers, but rarely affirms her directly. To him: He assumes she “already knows” how he feels. To her: Silence becomes doubt. Handle it: Make the private as affirming as the public. 6. Using distraction as presence He’s in the room, but always on his gaming console or phone when she speaks. To him: Multitasking feels normal… affection wasn’t modeled through attention. To her: She feels unseen and unimportant. Handle it: Give intentional minutes of full focus…attention is affirmation.

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Thursday 02 October 2025 18:27:00 GMT